GAY PEOPLE TASTE BETTER, LESS FILLING

Dan Dominguez has this blog. You have the ultimatum to read it or be thrown into the sea.

Wed Oct 26
pauljay:

nedhepburn:

Photo of a young man at Occupy Oakland after being shot in the head with a rubber bullet at close range for peacefully protesting. 

I was going to write something like “this is not how America is supposed to work”, but then I remembered that this is how America has ALWAYS worked. Nobody changes anything until people start getting shot in the face.

pauljay:

nedhepburn:

Photo of a young man at Occupy Oakland after being shot in the head with a rubber bullet at close range for peacefully protesting. 

I was going to write something like “this is not how America is supposed to work”, but then I remembered that this is how America has ALWAYS worked. Nobody changes anything until people start getting shot in the face.

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Thu May 12
I’d fuck the shit out of either of those spritely chums

joshandrosky:

POLICE CUTETALITY!

I’d fuck the shit out of either of those spritely chums

joshandrosky:

POLICE CUTETALITY!

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Fri Apr 29

joshandrosky:

azizisbored:

Wow. Watch this whole video NOW. Trust.

Well, you might as well watch this now before everyone has it posted on their walls by Noon(t).

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Mon Apr 18

I met a stranger on a hill in the dark in the snow and he told me that one day all would be chaos. Today is not that day. Today is the day that a raccoon plays in the bath tub.

pauljay:

danforth:

Who’s ready for baby raccoon takes a bath?

HIS NAME IS TYRONE BIGGUMS. HIS NAME IS TYRONE BIGGUMS. HIS NAME IS TYRONE BIGGUMS.

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Another in the proud line of Dan Dominguez Brand “Upsetting Cereals”

Another in the proud line of Dan Dominguez Brand “Upsetting Cereals”

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Fri Apr 15
pauljay:

fuckyeahdementia:

look at this dog

Dogs that look like this, and are awesome, legally HAVE TO be named “Gilligan”.

pauljay:

fuckyeahdementia:

look at this dog

Dogs that look like this, and are awesome, legally HAVE TO be named “Gilligan”.

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Tue Apr 12
he’s fun

he’s fun

(Source: robdelaney)

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Mon Apr 4

Commercial Fan Fiction #2

justinbecker:

Here is the second installment of the Pew-Licker Prize (it’s Mad Magazine’s version of the Pulitzer) winning series of fan fictions in which I take beloved characters from commercials and ruin them.

Commercial Fan Fic #2: GEICO

By Justin Becker

            Mrs. A scanned the crowd of students as they streamed out of the school in a snaking line. Jocks, geeks, gLeeks (tm), wastoids, sluttos, preps, stat cats, emos, fatties, snug bugs, cheerleaders, metal heads, flavor savers. Normal. All normal high school students.  He wasn’t there. Yet.

           Safe for the moment, she leaned over and dug through her glove compartment until she found her flask. She gulped from it, perhaps a little too overeager, the dark rum hitting the back of her throat with the force of a punch from Captain Morgan’s assistant himself. She reared back spluttering and as the tears cleared from her eyes, there he was. Maxwell. He grinned a little piggy grin, his snout quivering, and waived his hoof. “Hey Mrs. A. What’re you drinking?”

            “Nothing, Maxwell. Herbal tea. Pepsi cola. Doesn’t matter. Just get in the van.” She unlocked the doors with a mechanical click that in her dark mood seemed as decisive as a gun being cocked.

            “Where’s Alonso?” Maxwell asked as he climbed in.

            “It’s just the two of us today. His father decided to pick him up early and take him slot-car racing,” said Mrs. A, “father” pronounced thick with disdain.

            “Wow!” squealed Maxwell. “I love slot-car racing!”

            “Everyone loves slot-car racing, Maxwell.” Mrs. A rolled her eyes. You can magically make a pig talk, but at the end of the day he’s still just an enchanted pig.  For humans, it’s a given to love slot-car racing.

            “How was your day?” asked Mrs. A as she eased into traffic, but Maxwell was already gone. He leaned out the window, pinwheels clutched improbably in his cloven hands, screaming at the top of his lungs. Mrs. A sighed and pushed the speedometer up. She would get this over as soon as humanly possible. If she could drop Maxwell off in the next thirty minutes, that would give her a precious few hours of alone time, time which she would definitely need if she was going to see Guthrie tonight. Maybe she could squeeze in a quick ride on the stationary bike, try to pre-empt the tightness she would feel in her chest when she saw Guthrie’s face instantly go from laughing with Alonso to stone as he bid her a terse hello. Maybe she would post on a slot-car racing forum, remind herself that she wasn’t alone in the world. Though she was. So very much alone.

Read More

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joshandrosky:

I miss my girlfriend so much that I poorly put dumb hats on her while we’re skyping so that I’ll think she’s dumb and wearing a real stupid hat and that way I won’t miss her as much.
It doesn’t work.
Also, she makes that hat look good.

joshandrosky:

I miss my girlfriend so much that I poorly put dumb hats on her while we’re skyping so that I’ll think she’s dumb and wearing a real stupid hat and that way I won’t miss her as much.

It doesn’t work.

Also, she makes that hat look good.

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Sat Mar 26
This used to be my favorite cereal, I haven’t seen it at the supermarket in a while though…

This used to be my favorite cereal, I haven’t seen it at the supermarket in a while though…

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